Centering asexuality and aromanticism challenges romantic and sexual norms related to intimacy and desire. In my thesis, I use an autoethnographic approach to examine how my understandings of intimacy and desire shifted when I realized I was aromantic and asexual, or aro-ace for short. Drawing from written conversations, journal entries, and memories, I unravel the effects of amatonormativity and compulsory sexuality as normative structures that shaped my perceptions of intimacy and desire. I consider the ways romantic and sexual norms interact with the institutional power of schools, media, and marriage. I also explore the ways asexual and aromantic, feminist, queer, and anarchist communities challenge and resist these norms. I demonstrate the usefulness of asexuality and aromanticism as analytical lenses. I also argue that asexual and aromantic perspectives reveal the extensive, often oppressive, influences of normative structures and institutions on interpersonal relationships.
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